my new talking space.

shift-tery

its my first day attending the class and have this feeling that each day all of us would be bombarded with news that do not make our lives better. 

planner's full. 

have to pay such huge price to graduate from college. 

i totally understand why students commit suicide because of studies.

used to think that students that commit suicide are totally immature.

what the heck is award assessment? 

why are there always some weird sentences printed onto the fees bill with additional amount of $

wana get a new lappy. have to save like crazy.

coop's no longer my dog. he's with someone else.

but he's still my baby. and i miss him each day..

i'm a total bitch that needs people to comfort me daily, telling me everything will be alright.

a pity for CJ. i just won't stop complaining. 

need new shoes and bags. please. anyone kind enough to buy me those. 

omg. this semester break really sucks. have to do my thesis, and worse; paid RM12 to become a member in the public library, borrowed book for my research, and for the next 3 years, can totally win award for not borrowing any books and made such $$ contribution to the library. 

2 weeks, had enough rests i think. every bit of KIWI (sookie's chihuahua) reminds me of Coop. they're both dogs, Coop has loads of fur. Kiwi. is a practically a kiwi. short fur and huge ears. Kiwi bites. Coop bites and obviously my leg would end up being bloody. 

alright. Ipoh's fine. got air-con. so didnt' really care bout the weather. became fat cause erm. junk food. and each time i eat, sookie's got this stupid *glance* to let me feel all guilty for eating. 

watched FEED! omg. feel like puking after typing that four letters. eww. i should totally stop eating. 

i used to think that mosquitoes would never ever bite/suck my blood cause ???. but right now, they're totally feeding on me! and my leg is red-scary looking now. omg. i typed **** again with the -ing.

so bored. 

chances of getting the pug puppy is slim each moment. cause mum totally didn't update me. and also. sookie keeps saying that i'm jinx-ing the mummy, so she might not be pregnant afterall.

anyway. deep in my thoughts, i really wana keep coop...... i want him back. but........... mum n dad's going to disown me.

sick.headache.chapter2. 

i miss you COOPER.

thank GOD.

thank you Khew.

thank you Lisa.

thank you DaWei.

u're the symbol of everything.

friendship.family.love.care.shelter.joy.grace.play.21.

decision that i made........

it was so hard for me.

i couldn't stop tears.heartache.sadness.guiltyness.

you have been part of my life.

in fact everyday life.

that i learnt so much just from you little baby.

u're so well known at home for being determined and cunning.

you had your dramas.

and i hope you do not bring them when you meet GOD.

i wonder if my grandma can look after you there.

i'm just as childish as ever.

i cry so much that you get annoyed.

letting you go, knowing that i can't see you again.

i don't know how strong am i.

i'm sorry cooper. i truly am.

apology

i couldn't pay attention, and in desperate need to be around people.

this is why i've been studying in the living room since u're gone.

i have your imaginary picture plastered in every part on the house.

and having to think that i give up on you.

i'm useless. and i'm too weak to let you go.

i miss you.

but i don't have the courage to see you, with great depths of regrets.

i need time.

the first night spending my sleep alone.

waking up without you.

missing your little aggressiveness

missing you marking your territories all over the house.

missing you when you rather drink from the toilet floor rather than your water bottle

missing you crying for me to let you in

miss the times i bath you

missing how i always trick you

missing the time that you made me so bold and brave

miss seeing you play with everything.

miss the times when i cried alone...

no matter how tired and lazy you are, you would drag yourself just to be by my side.

miss.miss.miss.miss.

i'm really sorry coop.

for being the worse owner you have. no other dogs can replace you. NEVER.

i miss you. you caused me cry so much.

how are you doing coop? are you being good? do u miss me? (maybe not)

i'm so sorry coop.

there are scents of you in the room now. i don't want it to go.

when would i have the courage to meet you again?

forgive me coop. please know that i do love you.

be good and please behave alright?

omg. i hope dogs are literate.